Lilly flashbacks at the dentists

When I was a child, I remember going to the local Ben Franklin store during holiday times.  Except for Christmas, all the decorations for a particular holiday easily fit onto a couple shelves.  It sure is different now - Americans love decorating for holidays.  (Ok - I admit I do too, though not nearly as much as I used to!)  Holiday decor is such a booming business that current holiday decor fills several aisles and spills over all around the stores.

Today marks 2 weeks until July 4th.  If Lilly were still with us, we would be getting ready to celebrate her 2nd birthday.  I know I'd just "have" to buy her a new red, white, and blue outfit or two to wear.  Today's pictures are outfits that I have seen in the past few days, that I thought were cute.  The top one is from Cracker Barrel and the bottom two from Walmart.  All would have looked pretty cute on our Little Firecracker.

I've had the thought that when I put up our Independence Day decorations this year, that I would hang up some of Lilly's special red, white, and blue clothes too.  Today though, I'm not sure if it would make me smile or cry.  So we'll see when the time comes.

This has been a week of checkups at the dentist for our entire family.  My husband went Monday, T. and H. went yesterday, and I went today.  We all ended up thinking about Lilly!  It was probably most significant for my husband, because the last time he went to the dentist, was the day that Lilly passed away.  What a blessing it was though, as he came home about an hour and a half earlier than usual that day.  He came in the house while Lilly and I were on my exercise mat and she was grinning as she laid next to me.  He held her and talked to her for about 15 minutes before he laid her down for her final nap.

The day before that, I had a dentist appointment.  All the children came with me and T. sat holding Lilly the whole time.  Of course I thought about that today.  When the dentist came to check me, I thanked him in person for the sympathy his office sent right after Lilly's death.  (I bet not many dentist offices do that!)  They also had a Gideon Bible placed in Lilly's name.

Yesterday H. had his first dentist appointment ever.  Both he and T. were in chairs near each other getting their cleanings.  T. told employees about Lilly and shared with them her little Lilly photo book that she keeps in her purse.  Several hygienists remembered how Lilly would come with us.  One gave me a tearful hug saying she had lost her 3 week old baby and couldn't imagine how hard it would be to lose a 17 month old.  (I say it hurts terribly no matter how long - or short - you have that person with you!)  I missed Lilly being in my lap at that office yesterday. 

On a different note, yet staying on the teeth topic!, I thought I'd share a few tips.  Both the hygienist and the dentist, at the children's dentist, stressed to be careful giving the children gummy vitamins. Because of the sticky nature (they stick easily in between teeth) they have been seeing A LOT more cavities in children.  Also I learned that paste toothpaste, rather than gel toothpaste, cleans much better.

T. and I recently made our own toothpaste and have been so pleased with the results that I'm switching my husband and H. over to it too.  We ordered a kit to make the toothpaste from one of my favorite websites, Bulk Herb Store.  The kit comes with bentonite clay, celtic sea salt, cinnamon sticks, whole cloves, and stevia.  (You can read about the purpose for each ingredient here and also watch a short video on how to make the toothpaste.)  Since T. and I made this toothpaste a few weeks ago we have been amazed at how much whiter our teeth are and how much cleaner they feel.  The toothpaste also removes plaque, bacteria, prevents cavities and helps gum problems.  Read more here!

Oh - and in case you're wondering - no one had any cavities!  ;)

Days like today make me thankful for this promise:

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” - Deuteronomy 31:6

Sweet Lilly video

Remembering Lilly and her Daddy on this Father's Day.  (Lilly is about 4 months old.)  She always smiled the quickest for him:

I was searching for a photo to make a thank you card with today, and I came across this sweet video of Lilly talking to her Daddy and me.  She was about 3 months old.  I sure miss holding her and hearing her little voice.  It was 6 months ago this past Friday when she went Home.

Last week our family was blessed to vacation in Chincoteague, Virgina.  (Think wild ponies and the Misty book series!)  LillyBear went with us and also enjoyed sightseeing.  I will post pictures of LillyBear's adventures asap.

We have a contest winner!

This evening, my My Memories Suite digital scrapbooking software contest officially ended.  T. and I were  excited to see who our winner was.  For everyone that entered, I wrote their name on a piece of paper and folded it up.  (Most people received the double entry, so they got their name on two pieces of paper.)  Then we put the papers into a box and thoroughly mixed them.  I even had T. throw them up in the air and put them all back in the box.  Then we prayed that the person that won would be the person that would be the most blessed by the software.  T. then drew out a paper, unfolded it, and read the name.

And ...

The winner is C.M.!  (I sent you an email already.) 

Thank you so much to everyone else that entered!  It really warmed my heart to read the entries, especially since almost everyone shared Lilly memories with me. 



T. and I have had so much fun playing around with this software.  We plan to do a lot more of it and will share more of the things we create.  If you would like to purchase the software, you can currently buy it for only $29.97 by ordering here and using this $10 off code at checkout:  STMMMS89191  And, from what I understand, I can run this contest again next quarter.  :)

 Another fun moment today was when we received these two bird and nest ornaments in the mail.  They were made by S. and L. - the sisters of little 6 year old Emily, that has full Trisomy 18.  S. and L. contribute every month to Lilly's memorial tree.  T. and I were so impressed with the birds and nests - thank you S. and L.!

Finally, our last photo today is of a Lilly angel that T. made the other day, after being inspired by H's whimsical paper Lilly.

"O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!" - Psalm 8:1



Angel balloon releases

In the Trisomy world, I have observed that balloon releases are a popular memory celebration.  I love the idea of sending balloons up to our little angels in heaven.  We plan on sending up balloons to Lilly on what would have been her 2nd birthday, July 4.  I'm thinking she should have a regular birthday balloon along with an Independence Day themed balloon!

The Chamberlin family had this balloon release (today's pictures)  this past Monday at their celebration to remember their sweet angel girl Jordan, who was born with Trisomy 18.  Jordan lived from June 4 - 7, 2009.  Her short life was only 3 days long.  But even three years later, her impact can still be seen on her family.  And it will always be so!  No matter how short of time we have our children, they are in our hearts and mind forever. 

The Chamberlin's balloon release was recorded by their local television station.  Here the link to the news video (it is now on YouTube): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OWB8146f90E&feature=youtube_gdata_player
I love how Jordan's mama emphasized that it is OK for people to talk to us about our angel children.  They are part of our families and always will be!

Jordan's family not only released a balloon for her, but for 53 of her angel friends.  Included was our Lilly with this pink balloon and name tag.  :)

I am so grateful for all the help and support within the Trisomy 18/13 community we families, especially mama's, have for each other.  It is a definitely blessing of the internet that we have found each other.

Finally I wanted to share a photo of little Jordan. Isn't she such a sweet tiny little thing? I love the matching bracelets she and her mama are wearing.

 

Jordan reminds me of newborn Lilly.  I think I will always be amazed at how much Trisomy 18 babies resemble each other.  Yes you can see a lot of their family in them, but you can also see Trisomy 18.  My son has been sitting in my lap as I type this blog, and when I loaded this picture of Jordan, he exclaimed, "Hey that's Lilly!"  He seems the similarities too.  :)

I know much of the world does not see it this way, but I love how these Bible verses show that God did not make a mistake when he created Trisomy children:
 
"¹³For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book    before one of them came to be." - Psalm 139:13-16

An amazing new billboard

One of the very first Trisomy mom's I ever talked to was J., the mama of Giuliana who was born exactly one month after Lilly.  Giuliana has been through a lot but is really doing very well overall.  Testing showed that she does not have full Trisomy 18 like Lilly did.  (Full Trisomy 18 means three copies of the 18th chromosome in each cell in the body, instead of the normal two copies.)  Giuliana has mosaic Trisomy 18 which means she has an extra copy of chromosome 18 in only some of her body's cells.

Giuliana has had heart repair surgery and many other of the same problems as children with full Trisomy 18.  But one big difference is, she can physically do so much more.  I'm sure that is due to being "mosaic."  But even with being mosaic, she is still a little miracle!

Giuliana will celebrate her 2nd birthday on August 4.  The celebration is beginning early with the posting of three billboards in high traffic areas of her city.  You can read more about Giuliana and the billboards on  J's blogpost.  I so appreciate J.'s advocating so hard for our special Trisomy kids!

T. and I are continuing to have fun learning how to use the My Memories digital scrapbooking software.  I made this page, using a discovery that T. made yesterday.  There are a lot of "effects" you can use to change the look of photos.  All of these photos were originally in color.  I changed the top one to "red."  The bottom left to "sepia" and the bottom right to "black and white."  I did this scrapbooking page in maybe 10 minutes, as that was all the time I had for it this morning.

T. quickly whipped out several pages too, and those are posted below.  You'll notice similarities in the background paper.  They were part of a six page designer template.

Don't forget to enter!  The My Memories Suite free software giveaway ends this Friday at 6:00 p.m.!  You can find out how to enter and see all the details in my review here.  It has been a lot of fun reading the entries that have come in, mostly by e-mail.  I can't wait to see who the winner will be!

I am having a good week!  My new Lilly with Jesus picture helps me so much.  :)

"Oh give thanks to the Lord; call upon his name;
make known his deeds among the peoples!
Sing to him, sing praises to him;
tell of all his wondrous works!" - Psalm 105:1-2

Lilly's memorial tree - June

Don't forget about my My Memories digital scrapbooking software contest - it ends this Friday evening.  And just to clarify (there was at least one confused person) - you do NOT have to buy anything to enter. 

Yesterday was June 4, so in honor of what would have been Lilly's 23 month birthday, we decorated her memorial tree with our June theme - birds and nests with eggs.

It didn't turn out as colorful as last month, which may be my favorite so far, but it is sweet.  Another problem may be that all the pre-lit lights in the middle of the tree have gone out.  That was very disappointing.  This is my first experience with a pre-lit tree and I was under the impression that if one light went out, it would not affect the rest of the lights.  I think it's still under warranty, but I certainly do not want to get a new tree.  I bought this tree for Lilly for Christmas last December, shortly before she passed away, so it is special.  I just need to find a short string of regular lights to wind around the middle. 

We really do enjoy our tradition of changing the ornaments each month.  I save each month's ornaments in small plastic tote bins and store them in the attic.  We will rotate through them all again next year.

Here is a closeup of some of the bird ornaments.  T. made pom pom birds:

H. made a paper woodpecker (his favorite kind of bird) and insisted it have a red, white, and blue ribbon to hang by:

I have a Dover publication that has Victorian bird images on CD and used that to print these birds.  I then embellished with glitter:

Artificial birds I bought off Ebay:



The tree:

"Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" - Matthew 6:26

My new beautiful picture of Lilly in Jesus' arms

What a wonderful day! Today I received the most amazing birthday present from my husband.  Ever since Lilly died, I have wanted a picture done of Jesus holding Lilly.   And today I received the one pictured here.  Isn't it just so beautiful?  And it looks just like Lilly!  (See photo below.)  Lilly's smile is so trusting and delighted.  And Jesus so calm, strong, and peaceful.

When he showed me the picture I just started crying.  But it was happy tears.  He had hired a former art teacher from the private school he works at to do the drawing.  The picture is very large and was done in pastels.  I'm going to have it matted and framed.  And we're going to receive prints from it.  I want to get greeting cards made too.

I hate that Lilly is not in my arms anymore.  But I could not ask for anything better than for her to held by and cared by Jesus.  I'll hold you one day again little girl!

After Lilly died, we received several cards with the lyrics to the hymn "Safe in the Arms of Jesus" by Fanny Crosby.  I had never actually heard this hymn before.  The title of the hymn is the perfect title for the Lilly and Jesus drawing.

Safe in the arms of Jesus, safe on His gentle breast,
There by His love o’ershaded, sweetly my soul shall rest.
Hark! ’tis the voice of angels, borne in a song to me.
Over the fields of glory, over the jasper sea.

Refrain

Safe in the arms of Jesus, safe on His gentle breast
There by His love o’ershaded, sweetly my soul shall rest.

Safe in the arms of Jesus, safe from corroding care,
Safe from the world’s temptations, sin cannot harm me there.
Free from the blight of sorrow, free from my doubts and fears;
Only a few more trials, only a few more tears!

Refrain

Jesus, my heart’s dear Refuge, Jesus has died for me;
Firm on the Rock of Ages, ever my trust shall be.
Here let me wait with patience, wait till the night is over;
Wait till I see the morning break on the golden shore.

Refrain

The artist of the Lilly and Jesus picture told my husband that she felt she really got to know Lilly by doing the drawing.  That was beautiful to hear.  :)  I hope to meet her soon and learn more in person.