Here it is a Thursday again - will Thursdays always seem like an anniversary of the day Lilly died? However this week, I am quite excited about a new idea I have to honor Lilly and help other Trisomy 18 families. I'm convinced that God gave me the idea in a dream. I'm not ready to share it on the blog yet though - but hopefully it will be completed in the next few months and then I'll tell anyone about it that will listen. It is amazing what having hope and a plan can do for the soul!Earlier this week, my husband brought home from work a handmade gift from the author of this blog. It is a little bowl made out of material. Not only does it look cute and handy, but it's made with "Lilly colors!" Love the red, white, and blue. I loved how even the packing stuff was red, white, and blue. How kind and thoughtful!
Thank you to everyone that has contributed angel ornaments - I'll post an updated picture of the tree soon. It's beautiful!
I wanted to share a couple links about Lilly that other people have posted on their blogs. I really appreciate it! I love to talk about Lilly, read about Lilly, and see Lilly pictures! I don't want her forgotten.
This link was from earlier this week and it shared the author's story of finding out about Lilly passing away last month (we love how she called Lilly a "tiny hero":
http://myawesomeoliveshoots.blogspot.com/2012/01/little-life-remembered.html
These are links to blog posts written right after Lilly died:
From the blog of Alegria, a little girl that lived for two years with Trisomy 13:
http://alegriaelizabeth.blogspot.com/2011/12/please-pray-for-lillys-family.html
From the blog of Faith, a little girl that is now 3 and has Trisomy 18:
http://littlefaithtobigfaith.blogspot.com/2011/12/tears-with-our-friends.html
From the blog of Aaron, a little 19 month old boy with Trisomy 18:
http://compatiblewithjoy-trisomy18.blogspot.com/2011/12/41-angels.html
From the blog of Lily, a 3 year old girl with Trisomy 18 (she and her family came from out-of-state for Lilly's viewing):
http://iseeloveblog.blogspot.com/2012/01/december.html
From my friend C (she and her husband drove 10 hours to come to Lilly's viewing and funeral):
http://inspiration4theday.blogspot.com/2011/12/looking-to-new-year.html
From Giuliana's blog, she is 17 months, Lilly's name isn't mentioned but Lilly and another Trisomy 18 girl named Julia (who passed away the day after Lilly) are who are mentioned:
http://www.g-giftoflife.blogspot.com/2011/12/december-20-2011-holiday-bustle.html
From the blog of my husband's niece:
http://musingsofmalonemom.blogspot.com/2011/12/lilly.html
We remain grateful for everyone's prayers, love, and support. I am woefully behind in thank you/acknowledgement notes, but please know that I am slowly getting them done. It is a joy to thank the many people that have reached out to us.
Something I would like to encourage people in - something that I have learned first hand on our Lilly journey - is that when you know someone that has lost a close loved one - send a sympathy card, call them, e-mail them, say something to them in person, send flowers - just do something to let them know you care and are praying for them. You don't have to say anything grand - just "I'm sorry and I'm praying." Don't be afraid to share with them stories that you remember about the person that died. Don't be afraid to mention that person's name to them! It is hurtful when someone will not even acknowledge a loss. I think people do it because they feel awkward, or are afraid that they might upset the person that is hurting. But you won't hurt them in a bad way.
Anyway, I wanted to mention that because I have had a couple people ask me my opinion about this. I have to say it is so encouraging to have heard from so many people, including some we don't really even know and it's a bit disappointing to not hear anything from people that you have expected to. I'm not trying to point fingers at anyone. I just want to share something important I've learned on the journey of grief in hopes that it helps others.
As the Bible says in Romans 12:15: "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn."
Thank you for your kind mentions in this post. I had to do it, I had to write, I had to bake, I had to sew. I was a little embarrassed and worried that it might be wrong but I have found, through the pain of losing my precious grandma, that the expressions of others help ease the sorrow. I was surprised how much a simple sympathy card meant to me. I'm eager to hear what the Lord has placed on your heart. God is good and our ever present help. Bless you sweet mama.
ReplyDeleteI absolutely agree with what my daughter said about acknowledging the loss of another. Every hug, every condolence, every sympathy card, email, love gift given to the sufferer helps to heal their loss. You need not prepare an eloquent speech, just simply say, "I'm so sorry for your loss."
ReplyDeleteI was blessed with two dear friends at church who all through Lilly's journey sought me out at each service to give me a hug and ask how I was doing. Yet some whom I've know for much longer, have never acknowledged Lilly's life nor her death.
I pray a deeper compassion for all people will be one of the many lessons we learn from Lilly's life.
Here's another you haven't seen :)
ReplyDeletehttp://musingsofmalonemom.blogspot.com/2011/12/lilly.html